Coaching and Counseling Services

This presentation contains images that were used under a Creative Commons License. Click here to see the full list of images and attributions: https://app.contentsamurai.com/cc/46697

Do you need counseling for depression, anxiety, infidelity, childhood trauma, relationship problems, marital problems, or parenting?

OR

Do you wish to improve some areas of your life, or relationships that are difficult to manage?

OR

Are you just going through some major changes in your life?

Counseling or therapy is useful to anyone. It is for all people. There is no longer a stigma attached to seeking help.

Best of all, counseling can turn you into a better and more likable person! 

With Mel Tiangco, July 2015, Nathan Chua talks about video game addiction on Magpakailanman.

Nathaniel Chua has a master’s degree in Counseling.  His office is located conveniently at the heart of Metro Manila in Quezon City, Philippines:

CMS Clinic

2nd Floor Back to the Bible Building

135 West Avenue (near EDSA), Quezon City, Philippines,

Telephone Numbers:  (632) 215 5193; (63) 917 855 6287

Email:  nathanielchua@onelifeonly.net, onelifeonlycounseling@gmail.com, nathanchua@onelifeonly.net

So if you are looking for counseling help in Quezon City, you need not look very far. Nathan Chua’s office is very near SM City North Edsa, and Trinoma Mall at the corner of EDSA and North Avenue, Quezon City!

Nathan Chua’s Areas of Specialization

Individual Counseling, Marital Counseling, Infidelity, Depression, Relationship and Self-Improvement Seminars, Anger Management, Parenting Advice and Seminars, Personnel Management Problems, Personality Development, Youth Counseling, Victims of Sexual/Child Abuse, Grief Processing

What is One Life Only Counseling?

  • You are assured your problems and identity will remain confidential.
  • You will not be judged by your religion, ethnicity, gender, sexual preference, occupation and even your lifestyle.
  • This is probably the only service in the Philippines that endeavors to employ a purely existential, secular, and humanistic approach to therapy, that consequently proscribes the imposition of the values and positions held by the therapist, on you, the client. In other words, the therapist shall in no way, impose his own beliefs and values on you.
  • One Life Only Counseling allows individuals, couples, and families the freedom to make their own life choices, and respects their beliefs on what constitutes for them, the good life, with the unqualified respect to their faiths, and the worldviews they have come to adopt. 

Here’s an interview of Nathan Chua with William Thio on GNN:

See other videos of Nathan Chua here:

On Video Game Addiction

http://www.onelifeonly.net/video-games-addiction/

On 700 Club Asia

http://www.onelifeonly.net/nathan-chua-on-700-club-asia-video-game-addiction/

On Infidelity

2014

http://www.onelifeonly.net/baby-expo-december-2014/

On Video Game Addiction

July 18, 2015

http://www.onelifeonly.net/nathan-chua-talks-about-video-game-addiction-on-gma-networks-magpakailanman/

http://www.onelifeonly.net/nathan-chua-talks-about-video-game-addiction-on-gma-networks-magpakailanman-part-2/

2016

On Sex Education and One Night Stands

http://www.onelifeonly.net/sex-education-and-one-night-stantds/

Watch One Life Only Videos at our

One Life Only Counseling Channel!

Click here to visit our channel and don’t forget to like and subscribe!

Latest Photos and Media Appearances of Nathan Chua

Interview on Failon Ngayon about the dissolution of marriage, August 19, 2017
Interview with Amy Perez and Marc Logan on Sakto July 13, 2017
After interview with Joseph Morong for Valentine’s feature on 24 Oras! February 14, 2017. Topic: Loving More Than One Person: Is it possible?
Guest resource person at ABS CBN Studio Kapamilya Konek with Jing Castaneda and Susan Afan. February 19, 2017. Topic: Childless Couples
Interview on Pepito Manaloto about One Night Stands 2016

What do children owe their parents?

By Nathan Chua

It can be as subtle as, “You’re going to be a great and successful doctor someday and make us proud…so we can retire early,” or as direct as, “You should study well so you can take over the family business for us.”  In many families, this is still part of the culture.  Guilt messages that inform the young of their lot and place in this world, a world that’s called the planet of the _____ Family (Just put your last name on the blank.).  This is often recognized as an entitlement that parents assume, the moment they decide to find a partner to have a child with (Yes, that soon!).  The results are almost predictable: the children live for the sole purpose of fulfilling the caretaker role.  If they’re lucky, for their parents alone, and if not, then it is for the whole brood.  This is especially so for the eldest child, or the sole male offspring in the family.

Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against kids being grateful to their parents.  Although there may be a debt of gratitude, such talk sounds more akin to just a debt, or a loan for future repayment…such a massive expectation for kids who wish for nothing more, than more playtime.  It’s also akin to telling kids to parent their parents.

Let’s put it this way, if something was offered you that you never asked or wished for, then it’s a gift.  Gifts don’t come with a price or a schedule for repayment.  Being on this planet was, and never will be the children’s choice.  It was the parents’ choice.  The difference lies in the motivation for having children.  Furthermore, we can all agree that treating a human being like an insurance policy, is seeing them as tools, not as human beings.

Now to go back to the question posed in the title of this post, “What do children owe their parents?”  The answer is nothing.

There’s really no telling the future and what your kids will do, but I guess if you play your cards right, your kids may end up loving you enough that you would find yourself saying, “Watch out for yourselves.  Don’t worry about me, for I am old and closer to leaving this world, with much to be thankful for.”

The Courage to be Vulnerable

by Nathan Chua

Life is full of paradoxes. It takes a lot to believe that the more vulnerable we can be, the more courageous we become. If you are wondering how this applies to our lives, here’s my best attempt to explain it.

In the words of a 20th century philosopher, “Man is a creature whose project is to be god.” The first thing we shed after exposure to emotional pains, is our vulnerability. No caretaker is perfect. We are all bound to experience different degrees of abuse, neglect, or invalidation from them. We learn early on, that the only way to get the results we want, is to turn ourselves into super heroes or demigods. We can either become subhuman or superhuman creatures and hide our helplessness behind a veneer of defenses, that protect us from emotional pain.

To illustrate this, here are some ways we try to be our own gods. We believe that we should be exempt from traffic issues. We believe our prayers save us from the catastrophe or won us the game, because we somehow have a better relationship with a supreme being than others. Our lack of vulnerability keeps us from taking risks in relationships. We mask our desire to meet someone or show a romantic interest, in our fear of being rejected. Hence having never really taken greater risks, we live with a number of unfulfilled aspirations. We look invulnerable in our predictable and yet ultimately, uneventful existence.

Living courageously is quite the contrary to what we think it means. In our culture, there is still pressure to conform to expectations in society. Our decisions are more often swayed by public opinion, face-saving options, and stereotypes that keep us safe and part of the crowd. We live in fear of being outcasts if we show our true selves and our authentic desires in life.

Living courageously is living vulnerably. Whatever we do in our pursuit of self-actualization, we have to accept that there is a commensurate level of courage required to face the challenges. For many of the good things or aspirations that we harbor, are gained only through our efforts to achieve them. Avoiding challenges to our fears can result in comfortable, but also stagnant lives.

Let me end this post with a couple of quotes from some of the thinkers that I admire. Friedrich Nietzsche tells us to, “Live dangerously,” and Rollo May says, “The opposite of courage in our society is not cowardice, it is conformity.”

Not No but Not Yet: The Key to Thriving

by Nathan Chua

One of the wonders of research is finding out how we can be as similar to each other, as we are different. Our ability to know how others are doing as compared to ourselves, has brought researchers to countless studies that attempt to proffer explanations to such a phenomenon. We have all wondered how it is that individuals with the same faculties, are able to achieve different levels of thriving or surviving. Why is it that some of us end up as highly resilient individuals with a capacity to adjust to varied life stressors, while some seem to get stuck in limbo, with very few options in life?

The works of some who have pondered over this question, have shown different results that range from the controversial, to the inspiring. Some believe that we are set for life, by the genes that we inherit, which is rather bleak and discouraging. There’s one study though that caught my eye as inspiring. The study attempted to find out in what ways the thinking process of the thriving, differ from those who are merely surviving. The answer they came up with was simple and yet profound.

In therapy, one of the things we want to develop is a resiliency that can overcome much of life’s difficult tests. However, that can be a long shot for those who have no place to draw their resiliency from. What is it that can motivate someone to bounce back from their setbacks? In the aforementioned study, they have found out that people who flourish did not see permanence in their state. This segment of the population does not see failures as an end to their hopes and aspirations. In other words, these people just cannot take no for an answer. They believe that no’s are temporary, and may not be the eventual result of their striving. They have their eyes set on the prize, the light at the end of the tunnel.

This is the key to resiliency. A failed exam? It’s just a setback towards another crack. A botched job interview or a rejection from a major company? It’s simply their loss. A lousy job that is not within your interest or does not pay you as well as you think you deserve? It’s just a step towards your goal. Let me wait this out for a few years and I will eventually get to what I truly want to do with my life!

In short, people who have exhibited resiliency have been found in the study to say, a no is not their final destiny, but it is rather, a not yet. Hence, they accept the stages that they go through, and are willing to wait it out until they finally meet their goals.

So next time we fail, which I know we all will, let’s learn to forgive ourselves and keep working towards our goals, which may not yet be here, but may someday be ours. Whether we achieve it or not, we hold on to our hopes, which is what keeps us alive, and resilient.

Is there such a thing as valueless therapy?

by Nathan Chua

As I work with different people who have varied backgrounds and views about the world, I am compelled to show respect to each one’s “values” and culture.  By respect I mean, an approach that neither judges my client’s values nor imposes my own on them.  This reminds me of the age-old debate about the possibility, or impossibility of a valueless approach to therapy.  The familiar argument against those who believe that it is possible, is that the mere use of a valueless approach is itself, a value.

Of course, I am not here to speak as one who has done in-depth research on this difficult question.  I am simply now presenting what my years of work and my continuing studies have taught me.  I think part of the answer lies in our ability to distinguish between what is a value, and what is a social convention.

As people, we necessarily hold certain “values” about the sanctity of human life, and the importance of human dignity (Unless of course, one is stricken with a sociopathic disorder), as inviolable and inherent.  We have the gift of empathy towards others and a desire to alleviate suffering among our fellow creatures.  I say creatures because our empathy is not just directed to our own species.

In this post, I would like to offer a place where we can partly rest our spirits, in our quest for the best approaches available to the helping therapist who, faces a variegated set of cultures and backgrounds in every meeting with a client, or clients.  A good approach to this problem would be to consider the difference between what are human values, as against what are human social conventions.

I for one, am a strong advocate of the need for us in the helping profession, to make the alleviation of suffering as our paramount concern.  For it is due to their emotional suffering, that our clients seek our help.  Allow me to use an example to elucidate this point.  Although having a gay relationship may, by the current conventions in our country, be accepted by a smaller proportion of the population, the value I have for minimizing human suffering, will make it necessary for me to assist such members of society, without hesitation, and with as much fervor as I would show with any heterosexual couple.  To illustrate with an analogy, if I were a surgeon, it will be the least of my concerns if my patient were gay or straight, trans or not trans.

I hope this short post on this complicated issue, makes us more aware of the decisions we make every day in our relationships.  As many of our misgivings and tribulations in our relationships, can be traced to a lack of awareness, of what truly can be considered values that we share.  For in the end counseling is really about a human-to-human encounter, at its core and deepest levels.